| Halima, aged 24: "My mother always told me and my three younger sisters that a woman is like a white wall, and that if she has sexual dealings with a man before marriage there will be a black mark of shame on the white wall. The black mark will be visible to all, and the wall can never be white again. The angels weep tears of blood, and tear out their hair in grief every time a woman is led into temptation by Satan and passion and loses the most precious possession Allah has bestowed on her, her hymen." Mødom på mode, Gyldendal, Copenhagen 2007 |
Islam
Whenever hymens are discussed in the media, Islam is frequently mentioned. This is somewhat misleading since the Koran does not actually mention signs of virginity like blood on the sheets. However, Islam does require sexual abstinence before marriage for men as well as for women, and sex before marriage is one of the most serious sins a muslim can commit. According to Islam virginity checks are illegal since this is an issue between Allah and the individual muslim, not between Allah, each individual woman, her mother-in-law, aunts, cousins, ...If asked about hymen surgery serious Islamic thinkers will reply that hymen surgery is at odds with the values represented by Islam. Whenever these issues are addressed they relate to the ban on sex before marriage. In this context, surgery is considered yet another serious lie.
So why does religion come into this at all? This is because it is used as an explanatory model by some muslims, who say: "In our faith we believe it is important for a woman to be a virgin on her wedding night". Some families and their surroundings do silently acknowledge that men have needs even before marriage. There is a saying that "A woman is like a white wall where a black mark of shame is visible to all. A man is like a black wall, where no-one can see what has been going on". In other words families comfortably turn a blind eye since there can be no proof of the man's actions. If families had more information about the hymen, it would be more widely known that there can be no evidence as regards the woman's actions either, since the vast majority do not bleed at first intercourse.
Thus the hymen as a symbol is very much about cultural traditions, combined with a religious element stemming from the religious ban on sex before marriage, and an incorrect argument used by those muslims who claim the right to check the sheets for blood in the name of religion.
